Bare Your Teeth
by Kylie Abigail
Summary: Madison O'Brien is in her sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Really, she's just trying to make as many memories as possible. Unfortunately, when your best friends are the Maurauders and Miss Lily Evans, nothing is particularly normal. Nothing really works out how you would expect, but sometimes, you just have to bare your teeth.
1. Chapter 1: We're Going Home

**Bare Your Teeth**

"Lily! Please don't." I pleaded, hands clasped together. The redhead gave me asmall look of pity before shaking her head with resolve.

"Madison, you have to tell him. Pluck up some of that Gryffindor courage!" I rolled my eyes and muttered under my breath.

"I told you I should have been a Hufflepuff. The Sorting Hat couldn't have been more wrong when he put me in this damn house."

Lily took me kindly by the shoulders as I sat in the middle seat of the train compartment. "If you don't tell him this year, when will you tell him? Never? It's not as if you don't know about his furry little problem already." I sighed deeply and looked into her deep green eyes, my resolve crumbling.

"This isn't some school girl crush. I care about him. He's my friend first and any feelings I may harbor will always come second." I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples gently. I knew she would attack me on this subject once again this year. I told Lily about liking Remus during our third year at Hogwarts. We were friends-the Marauders, Lily and I. Well, Lily was my friend and she really just tolerated the Marauders.

"At least Remus is sweet and kind. You could have Potter following you around." I felt a small smile creep onto my face. It appeared that everyone except for Lily herself knew that she was in love with James in the same way that he was completely crazy over her. One day, she would cave and I would be sitting on the sidelines, eating some popcorn.

I jumped slightly when the compartment door slid open suddenly. Remus smiled cheerfully and pulled his tattered bag along behind him.

"Hullo, girls." he called as he slid the door closed.

"Hi Remus!" Lily replied, smiling brightly as well. I nodded my greeting as Remus shuffled into the seat next to me and pulled out his book for the journey. I dutifully ignored Lily's waggling eyebrows and what she must have thought were encouraging glances.

I looked over at Remus, thinking about how much I had missed him over the summer. His ripped and dingy robes did nothing to take away from his handsomeness. He had a span of scars running from his neck to his face, which I knew did not end where the material of his robe began. They made him look much older than his mere sixteen years. He was taller than me by at least six inches, which was not surprising considering my measly five foot, four inch frame. His long arms met with his broad shoulders, but he was not particularly muscled. His lycanthropy gave him a pale appearance and a gangly body type. To me, his most important and beautiful feature was his mischievous hazel eyes that matched perfectly with the sandy blonde hair he possessed. As I mused, I had hardly noticed that Remus looked up at me curiously. I quickly averted my gaze, hoping that he would not catch me staring.

"How was your summer, Maddy?" he asked politely. I attempted to answer without making myself seem completely idiotic.

"Oh, rather well. I spent most of it with Lily." In truth, I had spent nearly all of my summer with the Evans', dutifully ignoring my parents. When I had returned from Hogwarts after my fifth year, my mother and father were very interested to know what I was thinking as far as future careers. When I decidedly answered that I had my heart set on becoming and Auror, my parents were not particularly happy. I knew they were scared for me, but that did not sway my resolve. "How was yours Remus?"

"As well as it ever is. I stayed with the Potters' for a few weeks. Speaking of, have you seen the rest of them?" I knew exactly who he was referring to.

Lily replied rather huffily, "I assume they're causing issues for someone as well as running late, as per usual." Remus and I shared and look and chuckled lightly. The truth in her words resonating within us.

A mere thirty seconds after Lily's comment, the compartment door slid open once again. This time, three teenage boys hurriedly entered, huffing and puffing loudly. Clearly, Lily had been more right than any of us had realized. James spearheaded the group, followed closely by Sirius and Peter.

"Ladies! Moony!" he cried loudly, flinging himself into the seat directly across from me and right next to an unexcited Lily. "Oh, how I have missed you, my lovely Lily-flower." She merely rolled her eyes in response. James continued, not at all rebuffed by Lily's annoyance. "And you, dear Madison! How wonderful it is to see you." I smiled widely at him and nodded. I rather enjoyed James' antics. Specifically towards Lily, as they enraged her, but still did her some good. She could be a bit uptight and a good squabble with James usually loosened her up.

Sirius joined us next, sitting down one the side of me that was opposite Remus. He and I rarely spoke, not because we did not get along though. It was more that I was interested in books and he was interested in snogging the face off of anything with long eyelashes and a short skirt. We were civil, if not friendly. I had to admit, I understood his draw. He wore a tight-fitting black t-shit with a muggle rock band printed on the front. His jeans were very dark and tattered around the knees. His clothes, with the addition of his black biker boots and shoulder length, dark hair made for quite the punk-rock image. His grey eyes shared the mischief that I found in Remus' and his sharp figures only intensified his appearance. He was handsome, that much was true, but I couldn't see past his unmistakable attitude.

Lily seemed to share the very same issue with James. He was boyishly good-looking though. His constantly tousled, dark brown hair and chocolate brown eyes made for a youthful adorableness, only heightened by his rounded glasses. His lovely appearance did not make up for his need to be loud and obnoxious. I would have to tell him to calm down if he ever wanted Lily to take him seriously. He was far too immature to be considered as a potential boyfriend for my best friend. All the same, his presence made me quite happy. I loved him like a brother and he was as close to family as Lily was.

Peter was the only Marauder who did not seem particularly comfortable in our group. He was rather short and round, with dirty blonde hair and the attention of a field mouse, which made his Animagus form all the more fitting. If there was anything you could rely on Peter for, it was his love for James, which was akin only to his love for sweets. The boy always had some form of chocolate or candy on his person. He was tolerable for the most part.

I felt myself relax as the train barreled down the tracks. I was going home, to Hogwarts. With only two years left, this year would have to be one of the best yet. I loved my school and my friends, both so intertwined with magic and happiness. Everything about the place offered a sort of freedom for me. There, I could open up and perform the magic that I had been missing all summer long. I hadn't even taken my Animagus form since I had left. It was really starting to eat away at me.

My animal form was a bit odd and felt even more odd when I could feel my animal characteristics bleed into my human life. Unlike the boys, I actually was a registered Animagus, discovering the talent when I was only twelve and dutifully running to Professor McGonagall for help. I quite simply did not understand why I would suddenly sprout a canine nose or a long, fluffy tail. I was now very glad for the instruction the teacher gave me. It allowed me to have pride in my animal form as well as the utmost of control. Now, when I returned to Hogwarts, I would be able to turn into the large, husky-like dog that I felt inside of me, as long as it did not cause too much distraction. Many people said my Animagus form was like Sirius' but other than being canine, the similarities ended there. Where he was burly and black, with his same gray eyes, I was equally tall, but slimmer and more agile. My eyes remained the same, bright blue and my fur was a light grey color. One of my most recognizable characteristics was the black boots that covered each of my paws. Simply thinking about my dog form made me want to change as soon as possible. I could hardly contain my excitement.

"Don't you think, Maddy?" I was completely taken aback by the question that had apparently been aimed at me. Everyone in the compartment stared at me, waiting for an answer. Remus even nudged me slightly with his elbow. I simply stammered unattractively.

"You all know she's been daydreaming, right?" Sirius finally piped up. Everyone nodded in agreement and went back to whatever they had been talking about. I laid my head up against the backing of my seat and sighed deeply. This was going to be quite the year.


	2. Chapter 2: Addictions

**Chapter 2: Back to Old Habits**

Hello anyone reading! I just wanted to thank everyone that has read, followed, or favorited my story. This is my first fan fic and I'm so excited to be creating this story. I want to give a special thank you to Dragongirl180 for reviewing! It's been a while since I updated and I'm sorry, but I have two chapters for today. Yay!

I smiled up dreamily at the castle as the train came to a squealing stop. The sigh that escaped my lips spoke of pure contentment. I loved it here. Everything about the magical place made me unbelievably excited. I'm sure I looked as if I was in a trance as I gazed at my beloved school.

"Let's go, Maddy." Remus called as he walked ahead of me with James and Lily. "Wouldn't want to miss the feast."

I nodded and followed my friends to the haven that was Hogwarts.

"I swear on Merlin's beard, her face turned purple! She was so mad." The Marauders and I laughed loudly as Lily recounted her most recent experience with her Muggle sister, Petunia. Lily always recounted the cruelty her sister showed to her when she was at home and I was happy that she could laugh and joke about the issues with us.

We had all settled down at our seats in the Great Hall and were now eating cheerfully after Dumbledore's welcome back speech and the sorting had ended. I looked around at my friends and marveled at the scene. James sat casually next to Lily, clearly hanging on to her every word. Lily spoke animatedly about a Muggle band she had seen over the summer. Peter sat on the other side of Lily, stuffing his face as usual. To my left was Sirius, observing the scene, much like myself. His posture was relaxed, yet still proper as always. Remus was to my right, chatting with a girl in our year named Lexi Edwards. I had never paid much attention to her, but Remus seemed to be politely interested in whatever they were discussing.

Come to think of it, Lexi was rather pretty. Her honey blonde hair fell in delicate waves to her shoulders. She had a freckled, but sweet face with full lips and a straight nose. She was a few inches taller than me but not tall or gangly by any means. Her attention was focused on Remus and I felt a tinge of panic as she giggled softly at his words. I frowned softly from my position next to Remus.

"You ok, O'Brien?" I heard a voice close to my ear ask. I jumped lightly and rearranged my facial expression into the epitome of confusion. I turned toward Sirius, making sure he saw my bewildered look.

"Of course. Never better." Sirius stared at me quizzically. I focused my attention on the half-eaten dinner roll on my plate. It was all that was left of my hastily eaten meal. The festive atmosphere continued, but I remained pensive for the most part. Soon enough, it was time to turn into our respective dormitories.

I frowned deeply once again as the group traveled to the Gryffindor common room, Lexi in tow. She was still speaking to Remus and I couldn't help but worry. Surely he was just being nice. He was so sweet to everyone, after all. Lexi turned to me suddenly.

"Hey Madison, do you mind if I room with you and Lily? My roommates from last year are pretty terrible." I blinked slowly before answering.

"Yeah, that's fine. I don't mind at all. I'm sure Lily will be willing to let you move in as well." I smiled encouragingly at her. It couldn't hurt to have a new roommate. Lily and I usually got a room to our selves, but I didn't mind sharing. She returned my smile and continued speaking to Remus.

Eventually we approached the portrait hole and James gave the password to the Fat Lady who repeatedly asked if we would like to hear her sing. We politely refused and made our way to our respective dorms. Lily grabbed my hand and excitedly led me to the girls' dorm. Her enthusiasm was so useful in soothing my forever working mind. Once we opened the door to our room, Lily flopped down heavily on what was apparently claimed as her bead. Lexi chose the bed on the opposite side of the room from Lily, leaving me with the bed in the center of the room. Lily mumbled loudly into the pillow.

"Sorry, did not catch that, my dear." I questioned jokingly. She cocked her head to one side so that I could hear her better.

"I said, it is good to be home." I nodded my agreement and lounged on my own bed. Indeed it was good to be home.

It wasn't long before the itch to take my Animagus form became nearly unbearable. Knowing that I was in a place in which I could transform but had not yet was painful. Lily and Lexi had gone to sleep shortly before and I knew my hasty exit would do nothing to wake the snoring redhead. I could only hope that Lexi was a heavy sleeper as well.

I reached for the pack of cigarettes I kept in my satchel, slipped them into my pocket and sighed internally. I knew they were bad for me, but it was a habit I just couldn't kick. I blamed my easily riled nerves. My only means of supply was the care packages my loving brother sent me once a month. They were always filled with an assortment of candy as well as four or five packs that he snuck in without my parents' knowledge. We had a concrete, ongoing sibling pact. I snuck down to the common room, knowing that no one would be awake, especially not on the first night back. I felt my inner canine whine in anticipation. I took a steady breath and began my transformation.

Changing to my Animagus form was nearly impossible to describe. It was screaming pain glazed in sweet ecstasy. My nose morphed into the elongated snout of a dog and I felt my body curve and double over as a four-legged stance became more natural. My senses became heightened tenfold and I nearly barked in happiness as my transformation completed.

I bounded out of the portrait hole, as set destination in mind. I resisted the urge to howl in exhilaration as my furry body stretched out and bolted through the hallways of Hogwarts. I eventually traveled to the outside grounds of the castle and relished in the pure freedom that was the outdoors. My oversensitive paws hitting the cool grass was an experience that could never be replicated. I finally slowed as I closed in on my favorite spot beside the lake. It had the most beautiful tree that was a godsend in the warmer weather and a welcomed shelter in the rain. I smiled wolfishly and curled myself up beside the tree. I stretched out as my Animagus once more before my nicotine craving gnawed at me.

I slowly morphed back into my human form and withdrew a square from the pack, grasping it with my lips and lighting it with the zippo I kept in the small box. I took a deep drag, feeling the smoke fill me. The exhale was even more enjoyable, the tendrils of smoke dancing in my face. I closed my eyes and smiled softly. This was relaxation. I took a few long drags before a voice startled me out of my calm state.

"Spare a fag?" A voice rang out in the silence of the night.


	3. Chapter 3: Sink or Swim

**Chapter 3: Sink or Swim**

I whipped around quickly, repressing the urge to growl out loud. A ruffled Sirius Black stared back at me with a question in his eyes. I relaxed momentarily and pulled a slim cigarette from the pack. He took it gingerly and I handed him my lighter as well.

"What are you doing here?" I finally asked, slowly nursing my cigarette.

"I could ask you the same thing." he said in response. "Just needed to get some air, really. Changing didn't hurt either." I nodded in agreement.

"It's been months since I could transform. I've been driving Lily nuts." He laughed at my admittance.

"I guess someone other than James should have a chance at that." We chuckled lightly, recalling James' tendency to enrage my best friend. He let out a stream of smoke and leaned back casually. We sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying the peaceful quiet of the lake. Sirius turned to me suddenly.

"So how long have you like Remus?" I inhaled sharply and stared at him in fear, my eyes widened.

"What are you talking about?" His words made my heart thump in the most unpleasant way.

"I'm not daft and you're not sneaky." He cheerfully replied, smirking around is cigarette. I sighed loudly and decided to simply accept his accusations. My eyes closed slowly and I leaned my head against the trunk of the tree behind me.

"Since the start of third year." My desolation broke through the words. Sirius cocked his head to the side, studying me.

"You've never told him?" I met his quizzical gaze.

"I can't do that. He only thinks of me as a friend. Plus I'm a lousy excuse for a Gryffindor. My courage is nonexistent. I only care that he's happy. If staying his friend and nothing more means he's happy, I'm find with that." My voice cracked painfully in the middle of my last sentence. He looked at me with his head cocked once again; his canine Animagus really shined through in times like this.

I simply turned back toward the lake and away from his gaze. I finished my cigarette and went to throw the butt in the lake. Sirius gently grabbed my outstretched arm and motioned for me to hand him my cigarette. I forked it over and observed him. He pulled out his wand from his back pocket and held it to the two cigarettes lying on the ground. _Incendio. _He whispered the word softly and cigarettes began to rapidly burn until they were nothing but ash, which promptly blew away in the light breeze. I smiled up at him before standing up and gently brushing off my back. He also righted himself and turned to face the looming castle behind us.

"Well, I suppose we should turn in. Fancy a race back to the castle?" Sirius smiled wickedly. Before he had finished is sentence, I was beginning to turn back to my animal form. Whenever the Marauders and I accompanied Moony on his monthly transformation, Sirius and I would race, always competing with each other in our canine bodies. Sirius morphed before my highly sensitive eyes and I bounced around in excitement, my padded paws squishing into the springy grass. When he calmly came to stand beside me, I let out an impatient yep in anticipation. We leapt at the silent cue of counting to three in our heads and took off towards the school. My paws thudded heavily against the ground and I matched Padfoot, stride for stride. We finally met at the school entrance with no clear winner.

I may not beat him, but he sure as hell wasn't going to win either. I panted heavily and stretched my long, furry body out as I prepared to become human once again. As I changed, I watched Sirius do the same. His long snout and furry face shrunk and morphed gracefully until he was returned to his human features. He grinned at me once the transformation was complete.

"Never beat me, never let me win." I smiled back at him.

"I can promise you, I'll never ever let you win." He inclined his head at my words.

"And you shouldn't! I'll get the drop on you one day."

"Don't count on it, Black." He grinned widely now, a small twinkle in his eyes. We turned towards Gryffindor Tower and began the journey to the warm beds that awaited us. I knew I would curse myself in the morning for my late night out.

"Excited to be back?" I asked as we sluggishly loped to the tower, taking our time.

"Oh, you have no idea." He looked down at his feet; the worn leather was suddenly very interesting to him. "Home isn't exactly enjoyable right now." I bobbed my head in understanding. I knew all about Sirius' family life and his pureblood-obsessed parents. Being half-blood myself, I thanked my lucky stars that my mother did not buy into the purity craze that many pureblood witches and wizards believed in. My witch mother fell in love with a Muggle and she never regretted his lack of magic. Magic was magic, regardless of your lineage. Hell, Lily was one of the most talented witches I knew and her parents were Muggles.

"And you?" he looked up at me expectantly.

"This is home. Mom and Dad still aren't happy about the whole Auror thing, so I've really been hiding out at Lily's. I've missed the wizard world over the summer."

"Parents worry, or so I'm told." I smiled encouragingly at him. My heart broke slightly at his forlorn tone.

"The Potters worry about you. All of us do. You know that." Be bobbed his head up and down, taking in my words and starting to cheer up slightly. The portrait hole was now within sight. We fell into a short silence before Sirius gave the Fat Lady the password. The portrait swung open and she complained sleepily about being awoken at all hours of the night. Sirius climbed in first and I followed suit. I groggily made my way towards the girls' dormitory as he veered toward the boys'

"Good night, Padfoot!" I called in a whisper that sounded more like a shout in the empty common room.

"Sleep well." Sirius whispered in return. "Oh, and Madison."

"Yes, Sirius?"

"You really should just tell Remus. You know he'll understand, love." His expression was encouraging, but it still made my stomach roll in nervousness at the mention of Remus. I nodded shortly and began the ascent to my room. Once I got there, I tiptoed to my bed, passing a snoring Lily and a rumpled, but still sleeping Lexi. Apparently she was a heavy and odd sleeper, her body was nearly sideways in the bed, making her feet hang off the edge of the bed. I laughed quietly to myself and crawled into my bed, not bothering to change into night robes. I snuggled the blanket up to my chin and inhaled deeply. I needed to gather some courage and speak to Remus. My inner pessimist whispered nasty comments in protest. _He'll never like you back. You're only his friend. Why would he choose you? You're not pretty enough. _I closed my eyes, shutting off the inner babble.

I mentally set a deadline for my proclamation of romantic feelings. I was going to talk to Remus before the first week of classes was over. I slowly slipped into sleep with Remus' laughing face in my head.


	4. Chapter 4: Time Stood Still

_**Hey everyone! Sorry about being away for so long. My uncle passed away almost two months ago and I really haven't felt like writing at all. It was completely unexpected and hands-down the most difficult time in my life (I think you'll definitely see how it has affected the story). I can only describe it as losing a part of me. I really think this chapter especially is going to help me work through everything that has gone on recently. I hope you enjoy!**_

Chapter 4: Time Stood Still

I chewed my bacon viciously, as if I was truly angry at it. I was going to do it. Today was the day. No more hyping myself up and then backing out at the last minute. No more seeing Sirius shake his head as he saw that my courage had failed once again. Remus was going to know how I felt. I might turn red and pass out, but dammit he was going to know. I looked down the table at my friends and sighed softly. Remus was quietly reading his book with his elbows on the table. Sirius looked over his shoulder with a furrowed brow, no doubt wondering why his friend would choose such boring content as gillyweed and its medicinal uses. Steeling my resolve, I took one last, deep breath and laid my hands out on the table. Just as I began to move from my place, my family's small, gray barn owl dropped a neat envelope in front of me. Coppernicus circled back around the table and landed gracefully in front of me. I reached for the letter after giving Copper a piece of my forgotten bacon. He hooted cheerily and took off again. I tore the seal gently, careful not to ruin the parchment inside.

I pulled out the letter and quickly skipped to the bottom to see who it was from. I smiled when I realized it was from my parents. They probably wrote to me to ask how my first week of classes were going. Even if we fought, they still loved me. I scanned the letter, but my breath caught as I came to understand my parent's message. My hand flew to cover my mouth and I felt all of the air rush out of my body. The last think I remembered before I blacked out was thinking, "No he's not."

My eyes fluttered open to stare at an familiar ceiling. I attempted to sit up quickly but felt a pair of hands pushing be back down. I was partially thankful, as the sudden movement had made me uncomfortably dizzy.

"Now, now dear. Take it slow. You've had quite the morning. You need rest right now." Madame Pomfrey matronly voice softly told me. I had learned to enjoy the woman in my many stints in the infirmary. Really, we had become as close as a nurse and student could be.

"I know the drill Ma'am." I fight the urge to roll my eyes and settle with closing them instead. I feel the tears well up and my face begins to crumple but I continue my fight to wait until the nurse leaves before I completely break down.

My brother is gone. The words don't even feel real as I think them over and over again. He was killed in a death eater attack, hit with a killing curse before any treatment could even occur. He was my lifeline; the one who understood the trivial bullshit that occurred at home. When I wasn't at Hogwarts, we spoke every day and now we would never speak again. The gaping hole of his loss was so fresh and it took my breath away. What was I going to do?

Madame Pomfrey patted my arm and bustled away from my bed. I could only assume that my blackout in the Great Hall meant that everyone knew what had happened. Merlin knows I didn't want to deal with that any time soon. With Madame Pomfrey gone, I could sink into a state of pure shock and despair. The tears began falling in rapid succession and my entire frame shook with the cries escaping my mouth. I fell asleep to the repeated chant of, "no no no no" on repeat in my head.

Hushed whispers woke me up for the second time and I lifted my head to look across the room at the source. Lily was speaking with Madame Pomfrey and the nurse looked less than thrilled about my visitor. Suddenly the nurse nodded curtly in my direction and said, "If you must!"

Lily rushed over to me and threw herself on my lying form. She began to sob inconsolably and I rubbed her back as my own tears fell.

"I'm…so…sorry." She managed to choke out and all I could do was nod. She knew my brother and how close he and I were. There was no doubt that she felt just as heartbroken as I did. Eventually she lifted her head to look at me, her flushed face matching her hair. "Everyone is so worried about you. Of course they know what happened, but still."

I nodded once again and swiped angrily at my tears. "I'm ok. Well, I'm not, but you know what I mean."

"How could this have happened? He was so good." I attempted a weak smile and patted her head softly.

"I know Lils, I know." We laid there for what felt like hours simply thinking quietly to ourselves. Eventually Lily lifted her head once again to look at me.

"Are you going to go home? I mean no one would blame you."

"Just for the funeral. I can't leave Hogwarts. I'll be back in classes tomorrow." She shook her head vehemently. For once, Lily did not care about grades and I at least had the sense to be taken aback. "It's ok. I can handle this. I'll need your help of course. And everyone else's for that matter. This is still my home." Lily nodded and went to stand up. I grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. "Don't worry about me. I learned to be tough from the best."

She gave me a watery smile and a final wave before leaving the infirmary. I allowed my head to drop to my pillow and let the exhaustion wash over me. Sleep came like a falling shadow, slowing creeping over me until blackness encompassed my mind.

I walked into Transfiguration with my eyes trained on the ground. The mantra of "they're not all looking at you" repeating in my mind. I stepped past the ever-whispering Slytherins and took my seat next to Remus. He snapped his book closed at my approach and looked up at me with tortured eyes. I sighed loudly and collapsed into my chair, praying to Merlin that this day would just be over. It was the last lesson of the day and I certainly felt it.

"Madison, I…" he began but I silenced him with a hand in the air, pleading for his silence.

"Later, Remus. I can't stand to break down in class." He nodded and turned toward the front of the class. We would have time to speak after lessons were done for the day. I was reminded that I was supposed to tell him that I liked him before this week. I nearly chuckled when I realized how unimportant that was now.

Class dragged and I felt myself sinking into the routine that was Transfiguration. So much had changed. The world had lost a beautiful person. I had lost one of the most sacred foundations of my life, but Hogwarts continued on. It would almost be comforting if it wasn't so damn boring at the moment. As we were dismissed I managed to flee the classroom without being further accosted by any of my worried friends. The lake would be the only place I could go to speak about this with them, away from the prying eyes and tuned ears. No one else needed to hear about my devastation. I met Lily on the way to my dorm and told her where we needed to meet. I knew she would tell the others for me.


	5. Chapter 5:You are Not Alone

_**Two in one night! Holy shit people, it's a miracle! I know, it totally doesn't make up for not updating in 2 months, but hey it's something. I work night audit at a hotel, so I'm up from six one night to six the next morning and honestly, there is nothing to do so…. Yeah this will be when I post the most. College hurts my creativity in a really awful way i.e. when I have to write an English paper every week, I don't really feeling like writing anything else. Anyway, enough about me let's get to Maddy!**_

Chapter 5: You are Not Alone

I looked around at the solemn faces surrounding me. Even James, who I could always count on to be cheery and goofy had tears in his eyes. Everyone looked beyond forlorn and I didn't blame them. I couldn't imagine that I looked much better. I was sure my face was bright red as I attempted to choke back the sobs that threatened to break free. Lexi and Lily were on either side of me, holding my hands and occasionally wiping the tears from their faces. I had learned in the last week that Lexi was truly sweet. She had an innocent view of the world and was incredibly handy at giving a fully honest opinion. I actually liked her. I decided the silence needed to be broken.

"Of course, you're all invited to the funeral. It's on Saturday. I understand if any of you can't make it…" From directly across from me, Sirius silenced me with a look.

"You've got to be kidding, Maddy. We're all going." My friends nodded their agreement. I shot him what should have been a bright smile. He looked me in the eyes and attempted his own smile in response. "We loved him too, dove." A fresh set of tears began to well in my eyes as I realized how lucky I was to have these people in my life. Even as one person was ripped from me, I had so many people willing to catch me as I fell.

As night fell on Hogwarts, I announced that it was time to turn in and began to rise from the spongy ground. A hand jutted in front of me and I peered up to see James was attached to it. I took it gratefully and he ruffled my hair as I stood. I shot him a disgruntled look and he smiled sweetly. The rest of the group began to stand he threw a gangly arm around my shoulders to escort me in. Sirius joined us on my other side, looking relatively serene, even though I'm sure he was fighting the urge to laugh at his friends antics. Remus, Peter, and the girls trailed behind and spoke quietly among themselves.

"Is there anything in particular I can help you with Prongs?" I asked, nearly fearing the answer.

"Nothing really. Just enjoying your company." I chuckled softly and gave him a look, one eyebrow raised. "Well, you see…"

"What he's trying to not so gently say is, would you like to transform with us tonight? Prongs thinks it will make you feel better." I thought for approximately a tenth of a second before nodding. I needed a release for my pent up emotion. Challenging Pads to a race seemed like a healthy answer. I looked over my shoulder to my best friend who gazed back at me as soon as she sensed my stare. She gave me a tiny nod as if she understood and encouraged the rest of the group forward toward the castle.

James, Sirius, and I circled around to the lake, preparing ourselves for transformation. I allowed them to turn first, watching in slight wonderment as their perfectly human body became hairy and hunched, eventually turning into the beautiful creatures I was so familiar with. I took a deep breath and allowed my inner canine to take over. Within the blink of an eye I was in my four legged form, feeling the lush grass beneath my pads and smelling everything in high definition. Sirius nipped playfully at one of my back legs and I returned his enthusiasm with an excited whine. We began to run around the lake, James' hoofs echoing the sound of Sirius' and my padded thumps upon the ground. We raced each other, bounding around the grounds. I forgot for a little while.

Then, inevitably, it hit me with full force. I came back to our spot under the treat and turned back to my human form. The tears came then, and I wrapped my arms around my torso as sobs racked my body. James and Sirius came to a skidding halt next to me and instantly changed back as well. Sirius pulled me into his lap, brushing my hair back from my face and shushing me softly. James sat close to us, whispering words of encouragement as well as he could considering the state I was in. My wailing cries reduced to quiet shudders and Sirius tipped my head up to look at him.

"Can you walk back to the castle?" He asked, concern thick in his voice. I nodded weakly and wiped my face roughly.

"I'm so sorry guys. I just…"

"Don't you dare apologize to us, love. We're here for you." I managed a watery smile and he helped me up from the ground. James hooked his arm in mine and Sirius allowed me to use him as support, my hand at his back. I sniffed slightly and our odd little group made it back to the castle.

I climbed the steps to my room and collapsed into my bed the moment it was in sight. I allowed the sweet release of sleep to take me. I had never slept so deeply in my life.

We boarded the train quietly, everyone apparently afraid that I would explode at any time. I wasn't a time bomb, and I was getting damn tired of everyone walking on eggshells around me. Ever since I lost it in front of James and Sirius, they acted like I could break down and cry at any time. I was getting sick of it. We took our seats in a compartment; on one side sat James, Lily, Peter, and Remus, on the other was myself, Sirius, and Lexi across from Remus as always. Everyone seemed to avoid speaking, possibly because it could upset me. I heatedly looked from each of my friends faces to the next. I had had it.

"Alright, this is going to be a hell of a long train ride if no one speaks during it. I'm fine, guys. I'm not planning on exploding anytime soon and honestly, you're all pissing me off by acting like I'm about to." The jumble of words rushed out of my mouth before I had the chance to stop them. The awkward silence I had created in the compartment rang out for a couple seconds before most of my friends audibly sighed. The conversations began and I leaned back in my seat, genuinely enjoying hearing my companions joke and laugh around me. The next few days were going to be so difficult and I truly needed them to at least make an attempt to treat me normally while being supportive. I would be a right mess and they were going to steady me.


	6. Chapter 6: Love Heals All Wounds

_**Hey again everyone! So I had some serious issues as to how to write this chapter. I really couldn't include the funeral itself because it's just an indescribable experience that I know I wouldn't be able to put into words. Well, anyway, I hope you enjoy!**_

Chapter 6: Love Heals All Wounds

My mother's arms were wrapped so tightly around me that I felt as if my breath would never fill my lungs again. It was comforting and painful all at once. Her small frame shook as she held me and I stroked her hair softly.

"I'm so glad you're here darling. I wish it was on better terms." She released me and I peered up into her sky blue eyes, so much like my own.

The funeral and celebration afterward was over and only my friends and parents were left in my home. My parents were more than happy to allow the Marauders, Lily, and Lexi to stay there for the weekend. We gathered in my living room, attempting to recover from the service hours earlier and various family and friends coming to the house to pay their respects; wizards, witches, and Muggles alike. My brother, Jamie, was very well liked.

"So you and the girls can sleep in your room, Maddy. The air mattress is already set up in there. The boys will sleep in the living room." My father said as he walked to the linen closet and pulled out some sheets to set on the couch. "I know it's early, so you guys are more than welcome to go to town or have a walk in the woods." I smiled at my dad weakly. He knew exactly where I was headed.

I stood at the base of the tree, staring up at its immensity. My fingers ran along the mossy bark, savoring the slightly moist feeling on my fingertips. This was our place and I felt so close to him here. I allowed myself to sink to the ground, leaning my back against the tree and closing my eyes. I pulled the pack of cigarettes out of my jacket pocket and light one, breathing in deeply.

I told my friends that I was doing something that I had to do. This was private and I felt like Jamie would rather have it be just him and I. They had all gone into the surrounding village, hoping to catch a movie. I was glad that they left me alone without too much fuss.

"I miss you. I don't understand and I'm so broken right now. Why did you have to go? We need you here. Mom and Dad need you here. I need you here. I promise you, I'm going to do everything to make sure that no one else has to go through what we're going through." I sighed and took a few drags of my cigarette. "If anyone else could hear me right now, they would think I'm nuts. Hell, maybe I am."

"You're not crazy, Madison." I heard the voice emerge from the slowly darkening night. My canine senses were on full alert as I searched for the source. Remus appeared from behind a nearby tree and I managed to relax.

"What are you doing here? I thought that you were going to see the movie?" I gave him a questioning look, my eyebrow raised.

"I wasn't feeling so hot. I decided to come back." I surveyed him as he spoke. He did look pale, which made his scars stand out even more than usual. I realized that the full moon was only three days from now. I'm sure he was feeling the effects of his lycanthropy now. "Plus, it didn't feel right leaving you all alone." That was the Remus I knew, always so concerned about his friends. He came to sit beside me at the base of the tree. "This spot is beautiful."

"Jamie and I came here all the time. We would play king of the mountain on that little hill over there. He broke my arm during a particularly ferocious game." I smiled at the memory. He begged me not to tell mom and dad that it was his fault. I only agreed because we wouldn't have been allowed to play in the woods alone again if I told the truth. "We loved it here."

"I can see why. Maddy, you know you can talk to me. About Jamie, about anything." He looked so sincere that I couldn't help but laugh.

"I know, Remus." At that moment, I realized that this crazy, ridiculous crush that I had on him was just that. I didn't need Remus romantically. I needed him as a friend. He would be someone that I could count on when I asked for help and that was actually perfect. All of those years of pining simply flew out the window as I stared at the kindest and most selfless boy I could imagine. I began to laugh madly.

"Maddy? What is wrong with you? What's so funny?" I wiped tears from my eyes and attempted to compose myself. Speaking was not even an option at the moment, so I calmed down before I explained my institutionalizing worthy outburst.

"It's just…I thought I was totally in love with you. I've liked you forever, Remus. I never had the courage to tell you. Everything that has gone made me realize that I need you in my life. Not as a boyfriend or whatever, but as a friend. You are such genuinely amazing person, but I don't like you in that way. Merlin, I'm such an idiot!" I giggled once again and glanced at the boy beside me. He looked awestruck.

"Seriously? You've liked me for a long time? Why didn't you just tell me? I had such a crush on you last year!" He began to laugh as well. "I realized the exact thing that you're telling me now. Maddie, I love you but strictly in a platonic way."

"Well, I'm glad that's settled." I shook my head, attempting to understand the ridiculousness of our current conversation. Remus would never be anything more than a friend to me and I was really quite happy about it. Two weeks ago, I would have been crushed. Now, I was just ecstatic to have someone as wonderful as him in my life. "We should be going. Night is falling." I stubbed out my cigarette and tossed it into the darkness.

He rose slowly before offering me a hand, which I took graciously and brushed myself off. "You're a relatively intimidating Animagus and witch who is currently accompanied by a werewolf and you're afraid of the dark?"

"I'm not afraid, I'd just like to get home to see everyone." He nodded thoughtfully and we began our trek back to the house.


	7. Chapter 7: Those Sleepless Nights

_**So, once again I'm sitting at work with nearly all of the guests checked in, just watching the clock in anticipation of six o'clock when I can drive half an hour home, then pass out. Instead of playing my highly addictive shark game on my phone or doing homework like I should be, I've decided to work on this. By the way, I know it's kinda odd to have my characters smoke, but honestly it fits the time frame pretty well and I know I need to quit, I've smoked for a couple years. It's just something that I imagine my characters doing. Anyway, enjoy!**_

Chapter 7: Those Sleepless Nights

Remus and I walked into the house, chuckling softly. The rest of my friends were gathered around my kitchen table and they all looked up as we entered. Sirius turned to face me and raised a wary eyebrow in question. I simply shook my head and gave him a look that said I would tell him later. I took the seat closest to me, in between him and Peter as Remus sat gracefully next to Lexi. The conversation started up again as if our appearance hadn't changed anything at all. Everyone was going on about the movie that they had seen and I decided to listen quietly, just soaking in the normalcy. I looked from each one of my friends' faces to the other, considering how lucky I was to have them all.

"I still don't understand what the dream catcher was supposed to mean." Lily interjected.

"I think it was about how she was afraid of the dark and it gave her some comfort." Lexi replied. Remus nodded, even though he hadn't seen the movie. She shot him a brilliant smile and I was struck with the notion that they would really be adorable together. Lexi's bubbliness would make Remus come out of his shell and his more serious nature could help her calm down a little. They looked at each other with a barely concealed sense of adoration and I couldn't help but smile too. I nudged Sirius, who simply shook his head before shooting me a sideways glance.

"I'll tell you later. I promise." He looked back to Moony and Lexi.

"You had better, because this looks very odd right now." I stuck my tongue out at him playfully and he smiled in response.

The conversations continued well into the night and I noticed that many of my friends began to rub their eyes sleepily. Our structured schedule at Hogwarts was taking a toll during our attempts to stay up. Lily slammed her hands suddenly on the table and loudly announced that she was turning in. We all rose from the table at once and the girls headed to my room as the boys moved to the living room to lay out their sheets and blankets on the couches. I veered from the direction of the stairs, telling Lily that I was going to head outside quickly before coming up to bed. She nodded drowsily and thumped up the stairs, Lexi in tow. Sirius heard the exchange from the living room and told the boys not to steal his designated spot on the couch. Peter plopped down directly in said spot and fell asleep almost the exact moment that his head hit the arm of the couch. Sirius merely rolled his eyes and followed me out of the back door. I sat on the steps leading outside and he gracefully plopped beside me. I pulled out two cigarettes before offering him one and lighting my own. He graciously accepted the smoke and lighter and we sat in silence for a few seconds, just enjoying the night air.

"So what in the actual hell is going on with Remus?" Sirius finally asked, making me laugh at his tone.

"Whatever do you mean, dear Padfoot?" I smiled sweetly and he furrowed his brow.

"One minute you're crazy about him and the next you're thrilled that him and Lexi are getting along so well."

"Oh, that. Yeah we talked it over. I realized that I actually just want him as a friend. And before you start its not because I'm sparing him or I'm afraid that he doesn't like me. I'm actually completely content with our friendship. It turns out I really don't like him in that way." Sirius' confusion seemed to grow.

"Just like that? You're over and done with him?" He steepled his fingers and brought them to his chin. "I will never understand females."

"Well, I can't disagree with you there." He tore his eyes from the star-filled night to stare at me incredulously.

"Excuse me?" I giggled softly. "Did you just say that I don't understand females?"

"I was merely agreeing with you."

"I know, but I think it's hardly appropriate to assume that Sirius Orion Black, Hogwarts resident stud knows nothing of the opposite gender." It was my turn to look at him with bewilderment.

"Using your good looks to get girls into broom closets with you isn't exactly what I meant when I say understand."

"So you admit that I'm good looking." In my head, an animation of me sticking my foot into my mouth played. I smacked his arm, harder than I intended.

"Oh shush, you git. Now you sound like James." He pretended to clutch his heart in mock hurt.

"You wound me, dove. I couldn't imagine possessing the same level of ego that Prongs has worked up over the years." We both laughed at that, for validity if nothing else. Our dear James was no stranger to expressing the admiration he harbored for himself.

"Regardless, perhaps you should attempt to get to know girls before snogging them. That way, you could learn to understand us a little more." He seemed to ponder that momentarily, thoughtfully puffing on his cigarette. "Hey, do you ever think about quitting?"

"Quitting, what? Women?" His face was a mask of confusion once again.

"No, Pads. Smoking." I shook my head in amusement.

"Ah. Well, I've tried. I've realized I just do it because it gives me a break. Plus, I think it keeps me sane to some degree. I relax when I smoke." I nodded my agreement before letting out a significant yawn. "Is that the sign that you want to go to sleep?" I shook my head vehemently.

"Not quite. I was thinking about transforming before bed. You up for it?" As soon as I said it, Sirius rose form the steps and took his animal form. I quickly followed suit. I remembered when Jamie and I would run through these woods and the barely concealed jealously he possessed when I turned. Only then was I faster than him.

Sirius whined and nipped my tail, encouraging me to run with him. I returned his enthusiasm and began to bound through my backyard. We ran through the tall grass, pausing occasionally to bite at each other playfully. By the time we made it back to my house and changed forms, we were both out of breath and exhausted. Everyone in the house was well asleep and I could feel the drag of tiredness set itself in my body.

"Now I'm ready to go to bed." Sirius agreed by means of a small grunt and held the screen door open for me. I slipped inside quietly, bypassing the mounds of sleeping bodies bunched together in the living room. "Goodnight, Padfoot." I whispered as I crept up the stairs to my room.

"Goodnight, love." He replied quietly from the living room. "See you in the morning." I was surprised to find that I was sincerely looking forward to it.


	8. Chapter 8: Dancing for Rain

_**I really don't know where I want this story to go. Oh well, let's give it a try! Thank you so much to anyone reading, following, reviewing or favoriting. I was really afraid to write fanfiction because I really believed that no one would like it. I'm not that confident of a writer but I love Harry Potter and especially the Marauders era. Anyway, enjoy!**_

Chapter 8: Dancing for Rain

"For the love of Merlin, Sirius! Quit!" His grey eyes widened in surprise at my little outburst. "If you tap that quill one more time, Lily is going to have to look through every spell book she owns to find the counter curse for what I'm about to throw at you." He tapped the quill on the table in the common room once more before shrinking away from the withering look I shot at him.

We had been back at Hogwarts for a few weeks and the mountain of homework we received was getting to all of us. Lexi had taken to whispering to herself rapidly, quizzing herself on different magical plants and their purposes for Herbology. I had received average to high scores on my O.W.L's, but I hadn't gotten them by chance or pure talent. I worked hard for my grades, unlike some Marauders that I knew.

"A little tense, Mads?" Sirius asked me jokingly. I was sat at a table in the Gryffindor common room with Sirius and Peter. We had this particular class slot off, which I was truly thankful for, as it would be the last class of the day for the rest of my friends. Peter munched happily on a few biscuits that I had no doubt he swiped from the kitchens before meeting Padfoot and I in the common room. Sirius had been mulling over his Defense Against the Dark Arts homework for the past twenty minutes and his restlessness was grating my nerves.

"It just so happens, that unlike you, I'm attempting to write my Defense paper. It would probably be done already if you would just focus on yours." I turned my attention back to the parchment in front of me, dipping my quill in ink and attempting to pick up where I left off. Sirius threw his quill down, causing me to become distracted once again. "Problem?"

"Maddy, I'm boooored." He drew out the word, expressing his apparent distress. I shot him a look that expressed how unconcerned I was with his plight. He smiled wickedly at me before slowly but surely pulling my parchment away from my side of the table. I simply stared at him with concerned interest as he rolled up my homework and stuffed it into my satchel.

"Sirius, I have to get this done." I didn't have time for his nonsense.

"Oh, come on, love. It's Friday for Merlin's sake! You can do it this weekend. Right now, we need to get some food." Peter perked up at the mention of his favorite subject other than James.

"We should definitely go to the kitchens." He piped up, finishing his biscuit and brushing his lap off. I wasn't going to win and I knew it. "As long as you would like to, Madison." He added in politely. I smiled sweetly at him. He may have been slightly thick, but Peter was a nice kid.

"I suppose." I reluctantly left my cozy corner seat. "Let's go, boys."

"Yes ma'am!" Sirius threw me a mock salute and led us out of the portrait hole in the directions of the kitchens.

"Sirius! Hey!" We all turned to look down the hall at a frantically waving girl. I squinted in concentration as I tried to remember her name. Charlotte, maybe? Cheyenne? Something like that. She was still gesturing wildly, looking rather odd in the otherwise quiet hall. Sirius turned slightly pink and I could tell by the uncomfortable look on his face that he was seriously considering bolting. I held back a giggle as the girl approached. This was going to be great.

"Chantel. Hey, how are you?" His discomfort was obvious. So that was her name!

"Fine. Can I talk to you somewhere private?" Her eyebrows rose slightly and I knew exactly what this situation was. It wasn't my first time having an awkward run-in with one of Sirius' snogging buddies. This could go one of two ways, and judging by his weird behavior, he was not going for a round two with this girl. She was very pretty, with dirty blonde hair cut at a blunt angle and chestnut colored eyes. I felt a slight twinge of self-pity as I compared our physical attributes. She did not seem snobbish despite her good looks, and I was nearly upset that she had fallen victim to the charms of my admittedly attractive friend. Other than being unnaturally enthusiastic, she seemed nice. Her Hufflepuff patch looked fitting on her school uniform.

"Actually, I was just about to go do something with my friends. Can it wait?" He had an odd, pinched look to his face, as if he had just tasted something unpleasant. She looked at him dejectedly. Peter and I had the decency to step away from them a couple paces, allowing Sirius to do whatever he saw fit.

"Yeah, sure. Catch you around." She walked away slowly, much less excited than she had been moments before. I wasn't involved, but I felt the sting of his rejection all the same. Poor girl. I gave Sirius a hard look before heading off to our destination.

"What?" he questioned cluelessly. I simply shook my head in response.

I lay in my bed, tossing back and forth sleeplessly. What was wrong with me? I had had a relatively long day and just needed the comfort of my bed. I should have been asleep at this point. My thoughts began to turn to Jamie and tears pooled in my eyes. No. I had to think of something happier. Something calming and nice. I thought of my friends instead. Lily and her straight forward attitude came to mine. If I needed someone to tell me the absolute truth, I knew who to go to. She was so smart and I couldn't wait to see what she would do with that amazing brain of hers. James and his cocky attitude came next. He was so charming, regardless of how inflated his head could be. He was always there with a smile and word of encouragement. Lily and James' constant bickering that we all knew would turn into romance eventually made me grin sleepily. I thought of Peter and his innocence. He really was kind and caring, sometimes interjecting his quiet opinions into conversations. Lexi had really become one of us this year. Her, Lily and I spent countless hours together, just studying or having a break from the boys. Remus was the same Remus I always knew and loved. Now that my relationship with him was set, I felt like we could be truly close friends. He always encouraged me to tell him anything, from Jamie to how I was nervous about my Transfiguration quiz. I loved him for that. His obvious crush on Lexi made butterflies fill my stomach with excitement for the both of them. One of them just had to find some confidence and make their move. Last, I thought of Sirius. Over the years we had always been friends, not particularly close, but friends all the same. Our canine Animagus forms helped us to relate and lately we seemed to be around each other much more often. He was thoughtful, despite his bravado and he never failed to make me laugh with his antics. I didn't even have to put up with him constantly chasing girls as of late. He seemed to have calmed down in that aspect. Granted, he was still as handsome as always. I used to think of him as the most distant from me of the group, but now we seemed to be incredibly close, nearly doing everything together. He really was great. I fell asleep to a slide show of my friends faces, happily playing in my dreams.


End file.
